Have I talked at all about Tindering? Because I’ve gotten on Tinder and Tinder is annoying, but entertaining. I’ve went on one date so far with a skater boy and got close to a date with a funny, but privileged Hollywood kid before he ghosted me. I think he ghosted me because his last girlfriend was Asian and chances are she burned him in ways I would’ve burned him, too, because he asked me why Neo Yokio existed and I replied it was because Jaden is Hollywood royalty and his dad is Will Smith.
He replied “lol i guess,” like he couldn’t understand my point. Did he look at Midnight Sun and wonder why Arnold Schwarzenegger’s son got to do another “boy falls in love with dying girl” movie?
Being a virgin adds to the fun. It’s all jokes until they want to fuck and then I tell them I haven’t had sex so I probably won’t be hopping on their dicks any time soon, and then it’s static. It helps weed the guys out. My favorite is discussing matches with friends and trolling the guys we both matched with. Pros of Tinder include: opportunities to roast dumb men; matching with attractive people and thus feeling attractive; occasional witty banter; free food, of which I haven’t gotten any yet, but my friends do tell. I’m a splitskis kind of girl, but I’m going to splitskis less because, yeah, free food is nice. Cons of Tinder include: dumb men.
Speaking of free food, one of my Vietnamese neighbors invited me into her home and gave me three oranges and a bag of chocolate chip cookies today. She asked if I wanted to eat rice and my heart melted. My Vietnamese is trash, so I didn’t know the best way to address the trio of women and I didn’t know how to even address myself, so I told them my name was “bé Nhu,” using “bé” which is only meant for children, and one of them said I should be called “bé bự” (Big Kid). I deserved the roast. It’s fun being exposed to Vietnamese people outside of my family or outside of people in the small Vietnamese community I had back home where everyone knew me as a kid, but I like it. It seems like people don’t expect me to be Vietnamese, so when I break out the language, they’re shook. We’re mutually shook and mutually shook is a nice feeling.
I have a date tomorrow with a Tinder boy, but he seems sweet and I’m resolved to kissing him. We are having Kicking Crab a.k.a. most romantic food ever. C ya.
A STOR¥ BY ? 