I am sitting at a diner by myself, next to two men also by themselves, both reading the newspaper while I journal. When I got here there were two men seated in front of me talking about the start of World War 2. It makes me realize the only culture Americans know is fighting for a country that readily fucks them over and brainwashes them into fighting, as if war is all we’re good for.
Diagonally from me are three women. At their table is a baby boy and a little girl. One woman strikes me as particularly mean. She told the baby, “Sit your ass down.” To the little girl she asked if her mom is Jessica again and again. I wonder who Jessica is. Was the mean woman Jessica or was Jessica someone not in their lives anymore, who mothered the child then left, and so she must be reminded who her mother is. I order coffee and a waffle with strawberries and whipped cream. The baby is crying now. He is so tiny and fleeting as they lift him up. The women are all wearing long sleeves while he wears a t-shirt. They are gone now. Out into the world a person that needed more love.
The weather is overcast today. I have a full day planned for myself, but there’s a feeling in my stomach, something like danger. I should test out my mace.
Today the ride on the metro is a very peaceful. More people coming in. That ‘danger’ I was feeling this morning was actually coffee. My body is responding 100% to all the things I’m putting into it. It’s a well-oiled machine, except for the whole haven’t had my period in three months thing. Someone has finally sat down next to me. He is not giving me weird vibes, so I’m thankful. A woman gets on and, forced to stand, says happily, “I like watching things go by.” The weather is mellowing everyone out. I feel like I can doze off. This is what the world should feel like for everyone all the time. Meanwhile in the Middle East nothing makes sense. What is America doing any of it for? We gave them the weapons to justify our own. Half the country is in a frenzy. Up in arms. And for what? Because we demand equality, human rights, and the respect every person deserves? No man or woman worth more than the next.
This guy got on the metro smelling like straight up chocolate chip cookies.
A STOR¥ BY ? 